Hello from LaLa Land!
Mar. 20th, 2023 07:33 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
noblwishDear 12yo Me;
You've just walked out of Cine 6 after seeing "Return of the Jedi" for the 9th time! You and Mom white-lied to Daddy about where you were going and what you were doing, but the cat was out of the bag when the car wouldn't start after the movie. Daddy laughing and telling us he KNEW exactly what we were up to will become a Core Memory... as will the fact that you had officially met your True Love. You just didn't know it, yet.
You thought it was a schoolgirl infatuation, a pre-teen fantasy. You prayed you'd grow out of it! You prayed so hard, you can't pinpoint the moment when you stopped fearing your destiny and just accepted and embraced it. Newsflash: You never did grow out of that fantasy. It's what brought to to where you are right now.
After that fateful day in 1983, you lost yourself in a world of make-believe, drowning your grief from the loss of your brother, and the lifestyle that his survival required, in detailed imaginations of running off to "Hollywood" and becoming someone else when the cameras started turning. You didn't even know where Hollywood was, exactly -- San Francisco, maybe? Somewhere in California, anyhow. You swore you'd hop a bus to the West Coast the day you turned 18! You did not... for reasons. Ask your 18yo self.
Dear 18yo Me;
It's okay, sweetie. You did the right thing. As your 43yo self will tell you someday, Los Angeles (that's where Hollywood is, btw) would have chewed you up and spit you out! You'd have survived, but it would have taken some hard knocks to realize that. Growing up in the Most Dangerous Town In Texas (tm) prepared you better than anyone might have imagined, but it would take some time for you to learn how to wield that power.
I'm proud of you for being wise enough to realize that "running away to Hollywood" when you knew NO ONE there would have been a Very Bad Idea (tm). Besides, even if you HAD succeeded, it would have turned you into someone you weren't meant to be: one of the Beautiful People (tm)! Look, kid... you've always been beautiful and you always will be, but THAT kind of "beautiful" is pretty fucking ugly. You're better off taking another road. Don't worry... some grand adventures are right around the corner. No, I won't tell you about them... SPOILERS!
So, ladies... I'm writing this letter to you from a room in the Millennium Biltmore Hotel in Downtown Los Angeles! This is your THIRD visit to LA -- you brought your 18yo daughter a year-and-a-half-ago! Yes, you've been to Hollywood three times, now. It's pretty okay. You've found reasons to want to come back and you actually DO have friends here, now! In fact, you have filmmaking friends (more like family) ALL OVER THE WORLD!!! But your heart and soul belong to Austin. Yes, dearies... Austin, Texas. I know, I know, the teasips, the potheads, the liberals, it's a long story (and they're not as bad as you think).
Point is, dreams do come true, but not always the way you want or expect them to. Remember that thing our 7yo self (Hi, baby-girl! Keep your chin up. You rock!) discovered about fantasies never happening exactly the way you imagined? Yeah... that's called "chaos theory" and it's hardly new, but kudos to us for finding and understanding it so young (You're so smart, baby-girl -- your teachers are stupid). It's still true for us and can be disappointing, but it keeps life interesting, so... at least you're not bored!
No, you're not rich, either... far from it! Sometimes you're lonely. You're ALWAYS stressed, but I'll let you in on a little secret: your mitochondrial DNA is addicted to stress. Mitochondrial... M-I-T-O... it's the stuff you get from your Mom and her Mom and HER Mom, etc. Think about it... it makes perfect sense. Yes, I mentioned a daughter, your firstborn. You have a son, as well. I won't tell you more than that because it'll make me cry. HAPPY tears, ladies! Calm down. It's been a week since I saw them and I'm homesick, but I return tomorrow and I have SO much to look forward to -- not the least of which is TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW I'M GONNA GET MY ASS TO CANNES!!! It's a film festival... a BIG one... in France! We've been there before, but not this part and it's super special to get to go, so... say a little prayer for your almost 52yo self. Travel isn't easy on my middle aged joints, but it's worth it.
Oh, and don't go thinking we're old, now... our generation has aged MUCH better than our parents and grandparents. We can thank the EPA and a certain little ditty that hit the Top Ten back in the 90's called "Everybody's Free (to wear sunscreen)." Speaking of which, that's the last bit of future advice I'm gonna give you: Wear Sunscreen! I love you -- I really do!
You've just walked out of Cine 6 after seeing "Return of the Jedi" for the 9th time! You and Mom white-lied to Daddy about where you were going and what you were doing, but the cat was out of the bag when the car wouldn't start after the movie. Daddy laughing and telling us he KNEW exactly what we were up to will become a Core Memory... as will the fact that you had officially met your True Love. You just didn't know it, yet.
You thought it was a schoolgirl infatuation, a pre-teen fantasy. You prayed you'd grow out of it! You prayed so hard, you can't pinpoint the moment when you stopped fearing your destiny and just accepted and embraced it. Newsflash: You never did grow out of that fantasy. It's what brought to to where you are right now.
After that fateful day in 1983, you lost yourself in a world of make-believe, drowning your grief from the loss of your brother, and the lifestyle that his survival required, in detailed imaginations of running off to "Hollywood" and becoming someone else when the cameras started turning. You didn't even know where Hollywood was, exactly -- San Francisco, maybe? Somewhere in California, anyhow. You swore you'd hop a bus to the West Coast the day you turned 18! You did not... for reasons. Ask your 18yo self.
Dear 18yo Me;
It's okay, sweetie. You did the right thing. As your 43yo self will tell you someday, Los Angeles (that's where Hollywood is, btw) would have chewed you up and spit you out! You'd have survived, but it would have taken some hard knocks to realize that. Growing up in the Most Dangerous Town In Texas (tm) prepared you better than anyone might have imagined, but it would take some time for you to learn how to wield that power.
I'm proud of you for being wise enough to realize that "running away to Hollywood" when you knew NO ONE there would have been a Very Bad Idea (tm). Besides, even if you HAD succeeded, it would have turned you into someone you weren't meant to be: one of the Beautiful People (tm)! Look, kid... you've always been beautiful and you always will be, but THAT kind of "beautiful" is pretty fucking ugly. You're better off taking another road. Don't worry... some grand adventures are right around the corner. No, I won't tell you about them... SPOILERS!
So, ladies... I'm writing this letter to you from a room in the Millennium Biltmore Hotel in Downtown Los Angeles! This is your THIRD visit to LA -- you brought your 18yo daughter a year-and-a-half-ago! Yes, you've been to Hollywood three times, now. It's pretty okay. You've found reasons to want to come back and you actually DO have friends here, now! In fact, you have filmmaking friends (more like family) ALL OVER THE WORLD!!! But your heart and soul belong to Austin. Yes, dearies... Austin, Texas. I know, I know, the teasips, the potheads, the liberals, it's a long story (and they're not as bad as you think).
Point is, dreams do come true, but not always the way you want or expect them to. Remember that thing our 7yo self (Hi, baby-girl! Keep your chin up. You rock!) discovered about fantasies never happening exactly the way you imagined? Yeah... that's called "chaos theory" and it's hardly new, but kudos to us for finding and understanding it so young (You're so smart, baby-girl -- your teachers are stupid). It's still true for us and can be disappointing, but it keeps life interesting, so... at least you're not bored!
No, you're not rich, either... far from it! Sometimes you're lonely. You're ALWAYS stressed, but I'll let you in on a little secret: your mitochondrial DNA is addicted to stress. Mitochondrial... M-I-T-O... it's the stuff you get from your Mom and her Mom and HER Mom, etc. Think about it... it makes perfect sense. Yes, I mentioned a daughter, your firstborn. You have a son, as well. I won't tell you more than that because it'll make me cry. HAPPY tears, ladies! Calm down. It's been a week since I saw them and I'm homesick, but I return tomorrow and I have SO much to look forward to -- not the least of which is TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW I'M GONNA GET MY ASS TO CANNES!!! It's a film festival... a BIG one... in France! We've been there before, but not this part and it's super special to get to go, so... say a little prayer for your almost 52yo self. Travel isn't easy on my middle aged joints, but it's worth it.
Oh, and don't go thinking we're old, now... our generation has aged MUCH better than our parents and grandparents. We can thank the EPA and a certain little ditty that hit the Top Ten back in the 90's called "Everybody's Free (to wear sunscreen)." Speaking of which, that's the last bit of future advice I'm gonna give you: Wear Sunscreen! I love you -- I really do!
no subject
on 2023-03-21 05:06 pm (UTC)